我好累...I was given a choice to stay in sg and finish my degree or to go overseas to finish it. i wanted to go overseas so that i can run away frm all de problems. but tt will be avoiding and it will not solve anything. staying in sg yet i am so worried bout so many tings that i dunno how to concentrate at the moment. 有人对我说累了就去睡...我想我现在就是这样过日子...its been yrs since the pain acted up that badly. i look fine on de outside except that my face look bloated now.. onli a few will understand why i am like tt now. but the rest.. even i myself blame it tt i eat too much..=)so i'm fat. well. so be it... even if i noe the real reason, i'm not facing it. i did not shed a single tear wen de pain acted up juz now. i did not show anything tt i'm feelin de pain. i did not want my family to noe. i kept veri silent.. close the door of my bedroom. lock it. and let de pain took over me while i lie in bed helpless. now i'm feeling better... so i'm able to blog. wen i was younger...wenever i was in pain i will cry.. cuz it is unbearable. but ever since tt time.. wen i saw my parents bcuz of seeing me in pain they cried tt dey cant do anything to lessen my pain i swear to myself tt i will nv show dem tt i am in pain even wen i am gg to suffocate frm de pain. 看见他们因为我而哭...我的心也不好受...tt was wen i am in kindergarten 2. i rmb my mum told me once...我多么希望痛的人是我而不是你...and her tears juz flow freely in front of me while hugging me who was in pain at that time..while my dad...he was standing at a side... crying silently.
